friday’s list for 27 july 2007.

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I love words. I love playing with words. I love learning new words and using big words and spelling words correctly. I like what words can do. For someone who loves words, this site can be dangerously addictive. Because it has this: the anagram-maker.

Seven anagrams my full name produces:

  • Banjo Ornery Tonsil
  • Baron Enjoy Nostril
  • Baloney Jinn Rotors
  • Albino Jenny Rotors
  • Snarly Robot Enjoin
  • Lesbian Joy Nor Torn
  • Robot Orals Jenny In

Bonus points if you can figure out whose names make the following anagrams:

Algebra Hound
Maraca Kabob
Crystal Toot

Happy Friday!

hypnotism is okay, but i hate magic.

I have a headache. I took Kya swimming yesterday. I’m feeling lazy. I have exactly two weeks until I visit Aughra. I’m doing more Obama campaign work this weekend. I’m having dinner with two friends tomorrow evening. I made a payment on my credit card today. I’m glad the Premier League football season will be starting back up very soon. I wish I had more time to read books. I have a lot of friends named Sarah. I would do anything for a cold Hershey’s Bar with almonds, but I wouldn’t do shit for a Klondike bar.

four years ago today.

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Four years ago today, I was giving birth. To a future Gene Simmons impersonator.

Dear Kya,

Today, at 12:23 pm, you will officially be four years old. I will tell you now that it has been simultaneously the longest and shortest four years of my life.

I can see you really starting to “grow up” right about now – you’re very independent, as you’ve always been, and you’re trying to figure out what you can get away with. You definitely test my patience, a lot, every day, but that’s okay because it’s balanced out by the fact that you’re a really cool kid. Like last night, we watched old episodes of The Simpsons, and then you insisted on watching only the “Symphony No. 6” segment of Fantasia (the one with the centaurs and Bacchus) three times. But only that segment. And you drew me a scary pumpkin at preschool yesterday – you couldn’t wait to show it to me. You like to dance and make up songs about me ( “Mommmm-eeeee, I loooooove yooooou, I don’t haaaaaaate yoooooou…”) and tell epic, ridiculous stories spanning everything from squirrels to zombies. You are very, very entertaining.

You are also trying to figure out exactly where you are between a baby and a big kid. You still like to be held and sang to and catered to – and I understand, though it’s not always easy because you are really tall and gangly. But you’re getting to be quite adamant about doing things on your own, your own way. Like zipping things up and brushing your teeth and putting straws in juice boxes and brushing your hair and holding Katie Hamster. Last week, though, you decided you wanted to go up the stairs to your room at preschool by yourself, and I got a little verklempt. I guess I’m not entirely ready to give up babying you yet, either.

I imagine often what you’ll be like as you get older. I look for signs that might indicate more about Future You. You keep rhythm really well, maybe you’ll be a drummer? You really like books, maybe you’ll be a librarian? You cry because I won’t let you look at the dead bird in the driveway, maybe you’ll be a coroner? You check in between your toes for fuzz and only want to wear skirts, maybe you’ll be obsessive-compulsive? The most important thing to me, though, is that you have a happy, secure childhood and are surrounded by people who love and nurture you. I have fond memories and fuzzy feelings about my childhood, and that will always stick with me. I know people who don’t, and it has, in one way or another, affected who they are as an adult. I want you to have the warm and fuzzy instead.

Happy Birthday, Kyabug. Thanks for being awesome. I love you.

i will be crucified for saying this, but.

Okay, here goes… (deep breath) I don’t really care about the new Harry Potter book.

Really. Not at all. I will more than likely never read it, just like I’ve not read any of the others after the second book. I don’t care about how it ends, although Scott has already told me. I loved the first book. I loved the first movie. I don’t remember how I felt about the second book, but I did read it.

It isn’t that I’m against the world of Harry Potter, and I have nothing against all of you who are reading it – don’t get me wrong. I guess what it boils down to is the hype. I don’t like the hype and the frenzy. I find it to be, quite frankly, kind of silly. I guess it’s just a glimmer of the remains of my rebellion against most things popular.

friday’s list for 20 july 2007.

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Today’s list is all about my stepdaughter, Cean, who turns six today.

I first met Cean in March of 2004, shortly after I started dating Scott. I went with him to pick her up from daycare, and we were introduced when she got into the car. She was wary of me at first, understandably so, but when we got home, she let me paint her nails purple and then all was well.  Since then, I have watched her grow and change and go through phases, and I love the person she is and the person she’ll become. So this is for you, Monkey:

Ten of My Favorite Things About Cean:

  • She lets me fix and play with her hair.

  • She will eat and compliment nearly everything I cook (except omelets).

  • She is rational and I can almost always reason with her.

  • She lets me read Ramona Quimby books to her.

  • She will go with me pretty much anywhere and always behaves herself when we’re out.

  • If she wakes up before us, she won’t wake us up – she’ll just play quietly by herself.

  • She is very good at persuading Kya, and I often use this to my advantage – example: Kya does not want to wear pants, she wants a skirt. “Cean, tell Kya that pants are cool and today only nerds wear skirts.” And she does. And it works.

  • We can have in-depth conversations about things like the eating habits of dinosaurs, what stars and planets look like and why we can only see them with a telescope, what would make a squirrel attack a human, and what college is.

  • She is brilliant and funny and beautiful and silly and one of the two coolest kids in my world.

Happy Birthday, kiddo. And Happy Friday.

 

a true story, or creative writing wednesday.

One day last week, possibly Tuesday, Scott was frantically dashing about after yet another morning foiled by the ease of the snooze button. No sooner had he donned his boots and grabbed his wallet when the doorbell rang. Foolishly, he answered it.

There on the doorstep stood two middle-aged women and a young girl of eight or nine. Their eyes were eerie and vacant, their smiles pained and forced, and in their talon-like hands, they clutched copies of a little magazine. This little magazine.

“Good morning, sir,” the leader crone began, her voice crackling in her throat. “Are you troubled by what’s going on in the world today? Do you find the evils of this society too much to bear? Would you believe -”

Scott immediately cut her off, lest his morning be further soured by her solicitous drivel. Valiantly, he spoke:

“Let me stop you right there. I’m an Atheist, and I’m late for work.”

The robotic madwoman gasped, clamping her gnarled claws around the ears of the young girl, in an attempt to either shield her from secular poison or to keep her brains from falling out. She was momentarily stunned, not knowing how to respond. Luckily, she didn’t have to.

“I’ve got to go. Have a great day! Bye!” Scott called in his most cheerful voice, and then quickly shut the door in the faces of the trio.

He breathed a sigh of relief. He had escaped… for now.

more to come.

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 The big move is complete. Boxes are being unpacked quickly. Settling in. Loving it. Will report more later.